Has anyone else found themselves softly humming Christmas carols, craving pecan pie and pumpkin spice lattes and embracing the ever-more-crisp air? I certainly have. We are approaching my absolute favorite time of year. The holidays seem to surround food and family and laughter; my birthday falls two days before my mom's, in the heart of December; I get to take sweaters and scarves and boots out of hiding and use my umbrella again; and the sometimes dreadful weather makes for plenty of opportunities to curl up with a blanket, a book, and a cup of tea. Being lazy is perfectly excusable and perfectly satisfying.

All in my life has not been completely joyous as of late, however, and I'd like to share something more personal than normal for me and this blog. For the past eight months (maybe more, I've lost count), I have grappled with crazy emotions and grasped for control of my sense of self. I don't know what triggered this dramatic shift in balance, and for months and months I have been desperately trying to find out. Nonetheless, and with as few details as possible, rock bottom was creeping closer at an accelerating rate and I was afraid. The little voice of reason in my head (she is a faithful and loyal companion) was, at this point, shouting at me: You need to figure this out, and fast. So, advised by a longtime mentor and considering my aversion to conventional Western medicine, I made an appointment for something called BodyTalk.

This alternative method of healing, as I've come to understand, helps our bodies re-learn how to heal themselves. Sometimes, with everyday normal distractions getting in the way, our energy systems cannot properly communicate. The idea is that we are all born equipped to remedy our ailments, but if our energy becomes unbalanced or the pathways become blocked, we encounter problems. To some of you, this may sound kooky, and to each his own. Think of it what you will, but it reminds me of Acupuncture, from which I've noticed real results. I have actually seen proof of one of my body's systems beginning to rebalance itself as a result of Acupuncture. For that I am grateful and highly intrigued.

With no idea what to expect, my first BodyTalk experience was different, to say the least. As I lay on a Tempurpedic-topped table with a velvety blanket in a softly-lit room, the practitioner held my hand and silently started to ask my body questions. I didn't feel a thing except the pressure of her hand on mine, and she would stop every so often to scribble notes on a pad or let me know what she was doing. She started to bring things up that I hadn't yet told her: I'm seeing that your sleep is effected. You're waking up between 1 and 3 a.m. Is this correct? Yes, as a matter of fact, it is. I hadn't really noticed or thought much of it- I drink a lot of water. Apparently, though, it could be fixed. She said, I'm addressing this now. Then, softly tapping on my head and then on my heart, I suppose she addressed it. Then came something even more interesting. You've experienced a decline in sensuality, haven't you? Your sense of self-worth? Well, yes, now that you mention it. I guess I have been wondering why I don't desire to be naked as much as I used to. I hadn't even hinted at this sort of problem, but she found it, and I suppose she addressed this as well in the same manner. After a few more minutes, when all was said and done, I left feeling calm and open and optimistic and great. I didn't even care that it was 5:30 and the red blinking of taillights was all that I saw for the next 25 minutes. I thought to myself, that was interesting. I guess we'll see what next time brings. And then I forgot about it, really. I went about my business that evening and then went to bed. As I type this today, I recall a quote from the healing center's mission statement, "Fostering the fertile and illuminating the overlooked." And in my very first BodyTalk session, some things I had overlooked were definitely illuminated. It's difficult to predict what my next session will bring, and on this new adventure I appreciate your company. Feel free to share your thoughts, whatever they may be. One last thing I should mention is this: From the moment I went to bed that night until my alarm clock coaxed me out of a deep and luxurious slumber, I didn't wake once. I believe there's something to be said about that.

Our bodies talk to us. It is our job to listen carefully.